I Hate My Job

Ugh. It hasn’t always been this way. I used to like my job, and even enjoyed it. Sure it’s not something I dreamed about as a kid, but like every job I’ve had I found things in it that I was able to enjoy. Heck, I even came up with a way to make my job title sound fun. I’m not a pest control technician…I’m a bug assassin, that’s cool, right? Over the past year though I’ve slowly been growing less and less happy with my job, and lately it’s dropping pretty near hatred and abhorrence. I’ve finally gotten fed up enough with it to take some steps, and am in the process of negotiating my leaving with my boss, who is being a great help. It’s nice to know that my years of hard work weren’t for naught.

Leaving this job inevitably leads to the question of what my new one will be, and as for that, your guess is as good as mine. I’ve been putting some thought (and a little, but not near enough, effort) into figuring out exactly what it is that I want to be doing with my life, but I’m not getting anywhere fast. I’ve worked up some general aspects that have been a consistently satisfying and fulfilling part of the various jobs that I’ve had in the past. I’m hoping that by following this unifying thread between the quite varied industries I’ll be able to work up a specific job profile that will be perfect for me. After that I’ve just got to shoot that profile out to everyone that I know and get them to pass it on as well, in the hopes that some people will know of jobs that fit that profile that I can then target specifically.

See, I’ve got this wacky idea about work. I believe it’s not just possible, but feasible to find a job where you can be happy, where you can feel fulfilled, and where you can use the skills and talents that God has gifted you with. While the overwhelming majority of the world seems to feel that work is just a drudgery that you have to trudge through in order to earn money to live your life (don’t get me started on those who prefer to live off the money others earn) I feel that there’s a better way, and I’m intent on finding it.

Judging by my actions so far I’m not overly intent on finding it, but I’m getting there. It’s been a pretty rough couple of months to start this year out, but things are getting better. It feels good to be making some progress on my current job, even if that progress is working on ending it; and I’ve been getting some work done around the house sorting through boxes so we don’t have as much stuff to move in a few months. I’ve just got to keep this progress up while I soldier on through the last month or two at my current job. Big changes are coming, and I’m ready for them……..at least mentally………kinda.

I hope.

Another Dinner Down

It’s another Sunday night and that means another dinner at church. See our church is pretty odd and right now we’ve only got services on Sunday nights. This stems from our morning and night groups being very different and our pastor’s desire to get the groups to become one. We dropped the morning service (don’t get me started on why) and added a dinner after the evening service to let people relax and build community. We started this new schedule last fall and it’s been working pretty well. There is a lot more interaction between the groups and it feels more like one body.

When we started doing the dinners they were headed up by our pastor’s wife and since I like cooking I immediately offered to help. Each week a different small group is responsible for the overall dinner, usually deciding what we’ll make, helping with the preparation, and then cleaning up. It didn’t take long for me to fall into the habit of being down in the kitchen every week that we’re in town, helping out. At first I was third or fourth banana, but now I’m a pretty strong second. Heck, lately the pastor’s wife has been busy with other things (things that are more to her strengths, which is a good thing) so most of the time I’m the only regular worker down in the kitchen. Treeva has gotten to be a great help at getting the dining rooms set up while I take care of things in the kitchen, and this system is working quite well.

It’s pretty funny that I’ve fallen into this lead position on the dinners because before this past fall I’d never done any cooking for large groups, and now I’m cooking for 100-150 people most weeks. I’ve been picking up the tricks of the trade as we go along and don’t have to think about things too much anymore. I’ve got my mental lists of what needs done and I’m constantly checking them. I’ve gotten pretty confident with delegating out parts of the work, but there are others that I pretty much have to do on my own because they’re just done by feel. Need some rice cooked or tea brewed? Better let me do it ’cause I make ‘em different every time, and am constantly tweaking the amounts that I put in. Let’s just say that I’m getting good at cooking by feel.

I do enjoy these dinners and sometimes consider trying to find a similar type of activity for a job. The problem is that on Sunday nights I’m doing the cooking as a service, trying to do my part to help build community in the church. I don’t know that I’d be able to enjoy it as much if I was doing all this work for Joe Blow’s 37th birthday party or whatever. Plus I fear that having a job where I’m cooking all the time will kill any joy I get from cooking at home (not that I’ve done a lot of that lately).

*sigh*

I just don’t know. I’ll save the need for a new job for another entry, but suffice to say that I’m not picky enough while simultaneously being too picky, and this is just one aspect of it. This is gonna be a rocky ride.

Oh, and if anyone is actually reading this, my small group is supposed to be cooking on April 1st, and I’m trying to come up with a good April Fool’s dinner. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated.

You’ve gotta start somewhere…

Welcome to my world. Here you’ll find one of two things:

1. Random thoughts and musings that I need to get out of my head and in front of my eyes so that I can process them and move on.

2. Yet another blog that is almost never updated.

Here’s hoping for number 1.